Moving the Family

Parents are often faced with the dilemma to move or not to move. There are many factors which can influence this decision. When a child does not want to move, this compounds the problem. The reasons for the move are the first considerations. If it comes down to improving the family lifestyle there is nothing wrong with parents limiting the final decision to their discussion. Considering the wishes of their child(ren) can be a part of any informed decision. However, making it the basis of said decision might not be the best course to pursue.

Husbands and wives should discuss issues first between the two of them, which is a perfect example of putting the marriage first. This provides an example for the child(ren) that the parenting unit can take care of them and they will be safe. A child’s reluctance against a move can vary but many times it is due to a self centered reason such as leaving friends. It is understandable when a child wants to continue to enjoy living next door to their “besties.” However, the neighbors probably would not extend the same commitment to never move for the sake of a friendship. Further, often “best” relationships evolve and others take their place.

Carefully assessing where you would move, taking into consideration the proximity to the children’s school and friends (if it is local), is a fulfillment of a due diligence test. If you move, your child(ren) will have to learn how to handle their disappointment, stress, depression, anxiety or whatever other feelings they may conjure up. If you decide to stay put, do it because you both have decided you do not want to upgrade your lifestyle. Young children do not know what is best for them, that is why they have parents. Parenting often involves making decisions that your children feel is unfair. If you approach parenting in an emotional manner than you will give in to every childish whim in order to not upset them. That is not how the real world works and does not prepare a child to become an adult who is personally responsible for their actions.